To help ease these (very natural) concerns, we spoke to a few parents about their tips for those about to join the two-child club.
Don’t worry too much about jealousy
‘I felt like I would be a bit of a traitor when the new baby came along, as it would take away so much of my time and attention from Rudy,’ says Rebekah, mom to Rudy, 7 and Annabel, 3. ‘But what I didn’t account for is how much Rudy loved having the baby around. There, of course, have been a few issues with jealousy, but my advice would be do not underestimate how much excitement your child will feel for their new sibling. And it is so beautiful to watch.’
A difficult pregnancy can make things hard
‘I felt absolutely terrible during the first four months of my second pregnancy and it really impacted how I felt about having another baby,’ says Nina, mom to Ivan, 4 and Lucy, 1. ‘When you’re running around after a toddler, feeling awful and imagining soon having a newborn in the mix, you just think “I can’t do this!”. But once Lucy was born I enjoyed it all a lot more than I thought and the transition from one to two children isn’t as big as from none to one!’
You can’t imagine love but it does come
‘It’s impossible to imagine loving someone else as much as your child, even though you know (or hope) you will,’ says Andrea, mom to Alex, 5 and Amos, 2. ‘I really struggled when I found out I was having another boy as I’d always pictured having a girl. So I felt guilty about that too. But it absolutely does come - I loved Amos as much as Alex instantly, and I honestly wouldn’t change a thing now.’
So try not to panic if the excitement levels for baby number two aren’t quite ‘there’ yet - there are a lot of parents out there who know exactly how you feel. Talking to others who understand can help – for more tips on this, check out our article on how to connect with other parents.